So recently, I moved to Swansea to start my career as a
medical professional (God help you all). My blogs are usually quite serious and
centred around me having the emotional equivalent of a bitch fit. The idea for
this – more light hearted one – popped into my head this morning mid debate with
the boyf. I’ve had an inkling for years that he’s a strange ol’ egg (Let's face it, he's got to be mental to be going out with me), but he continuously
confirms for me that his brain is wired so very differently to us normal
folk. Specifically people like me; the academics. So here’s a heads up on what
to expect if you ever find yourself going out with a musician.
1)
You will be ignored for their instrument of
choice at some point.
We have all been there. When they
walk through the door with that bright eyed, expectant look and you think
DAYMN it is on, and then he walks towards you and…oh. Nope. That look was
actually reserved for their Fender. Bugger.
2)
When he is in ‘the zone’ you’d best find
yourself an interesting hobby
Never in my whole life have I
ever given myself a better pedicure.
3)
If they’re a good musician, they will probably mock
you incessantly for one of your music loves.
My other half is a punk at heart.
I am a massive R&B/hip hop fan. It doesn’t matter how he tries to hide it,
when he sees me singing along to Usher I know a bit of love for me dies. That’s
okay though. Please notice how this ‘music snobbery’ mysteriously disagrees
when the subject of interest is Katy Perry in a PVC suit. There’s an allegory
there somewhere about a cat and a hot tin roof, and yet, despite this…it’s
okay, because she’s ‘putting on a show’.
Riiight.
4)
They will make offhand comments about their musical
talent because they don’t appreciate how much of a skill they actually have.
“Hey babe how did you learn to
play a guitar?”
*Barely looks up from playstation*
“Bought a Nirvana album, bought a
guitar.”
OH RIGHT SAME TBH.
5)
They are very passionate, opinionated people.
You will lose every intellectual argument.
Even when you’re really clever yourself. And they have this, this way of making
you think everything they say is a good idea. Which leads me to points 6) and
7)
6)
They are like, REALLY clever.
This may be a personal opinion of
mine, but I personally think creativity is one of the highest forms of
intelligence. Particularly with music. That someone can pull ideas out of their
head and formulate them into an all singing, all dancing number is a bit brain
boggling to me. They just know where it all fits and that’s the end of that. Seriously cool.
7)
They know exactly what they think and why they
think it.
Think it comes from being very
self aware. They aren’t ever afraid to stand up for their beliefs because
usually, it’s not just words and opinions they’ve garnered from someone else.
Just like their music, when they invest in something, they really invest in it
wholeheartedly (See 10)
8)
You will have to deal with women/men acting very
weirdly around them and occasionally trying to molest them.
Yes, hello. I see you eye-raping
him. He is very nice, I agree. That’s why you are not allowed. DESIST. This is
particularly exacerbated if they also sing in addition to playing their musical
instrument. In particular, their talent is a good opening point to
conversations for all manner of sexual predators. My particular favourite is
your 40 year old who thinks it is appropriate to giggle “Ooh, you could be my
son!” whilst subtly dribbling over her Strongbow can.
9)
You will get embarrassingly proud.
There will be many times where
you look up at them doing their thing and you just get this little niggle in
your chest because they absolutely LOVE what they’re doing. And then that
niggle turns into a bit of a chest puff and then you’re a bit close to crying
because it’s all a bit much and NO THAT IS JUST SOMETHING IN MY EYE GOD I HATE
IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS. You will also get a tad enthusiastic. You won’t like
every piece of music they ever produce, that’s impossible. But you will find
yourself unintentionally plugging them to, well. Everyone. You’ll also really really get to like the “Oh, my other half’s a musician” card in a
world full of nurse, teacher and business manager hubbies. That card is pretty swaheeet.
And finally, the most important
one.
10)
Musician love is good love.
The thing is, these bloody
musicians, they’re really REALLY good at making you feel like you’re super important.
And the best part is, they really think it. If they do love you it is an
absolutely incredible and beautiful thing. Sometimes, it will be really
difficult. Especially coming to terms with the fact that their work schedule is
untraditional, that they could have to do the thing they love a hundred miles
away from you for weeks or more. That aside, they are incredibly loyal, loving
and beautiful creatures with very sensitive hearts. So if you got one, love
them good, squeeze ‘em tight. And get some earplugs for the 2am sing-a-longs.
